Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction.
It take two to tango…
Women actually expect their relationship fantasies to be born out in real life. In the SMP and society at large it is assumed that men alone are the sex abdicating their societal duty in not preparing themselves for relationships, marriage and creating families men just need to ‘man up!’. Women feel an inherent entitlement, fully supported by society, to quality men and need only show up, no matter how emotionally and spiritually broken, physically unkempt, poor mannered, burdened with irresponsible debt, poor job or career prospects, saddled with bastard children and fully expect men to have an obligation and overwhelming urge to court, pursue and marry these unfeminine, dreadful creatures and provide for them and their ill spawned prodigy. It’s echoed in the ‘where-are-all-the-good-men’ and ‘I just need a “good” man’ meme endless exposed by women and their white knight champions. The reality is that there are no good men due to a combination of increased expectations, decreased attractiveness and substandard feminine qualities, and a societal stripping of male incentives towards relationships and marriage. The standards of sexual behavior are a two-way street… as the self-proclaimed gatekeepers of sex, women are failing themselves and the men they desire utterly and in the process they are getting the men they deserve; players, deadbeats and douchebags.
Wait for Mrs. Right, not Mrs. Always Right….
Your desires matter! As a strategic matter – men should avoid those people who we can be reasonably judged as being unwilling and incapable to provide us what we want, need and deserve. They simply are not worthy of emotional investment, as they are not relationship material. As the gatekeepers of commitment men have an obligation to ourselves to tell these women who do not fit our criteria for our lives, ‘no!’. By doing so you are creating the potential to do the impossible in this day and age: pave the way for successful, stable, monogamous relationships, not with just any woman who comes along, but just the right one to suit your personality, lifestyle, tastes and preferences that is prepared and willing to commit to a healthy, fulfilling relationship. It stands to reason that men ought to entertain a prolonged period in their lives where they are open to exploring the most highly qualified options they have access to, while concurrently developing and improving themselves prior to making a commitment of any significant magnitude.
The Vagina Authority
The health of any relationship you might entertain depends and survives on the frame you enter into it with from the very beginning. A man respecting his biological prerogative will naturally put his physical/sexual needs before his emotional ones… when a man acquiesces those needs to a woman’s needs of emotionally commitment prior to establishing a sexual identity within the relationship structure, the man is effectively trapped in a her-frame relationship, otherwise known as the vagina authority, which is well-known axiom within the men’s community . When a woman has successfully negotiated and manipulated control for the relationship frame through negotiated sexual access and plays at sexuality, it is always going to color your dealings with her. She has established a conditional reward for desired behavior that lies at the crux of an intimate relationship. This is no way to go through life. Your relationship becomes an ever-present, unspoken understanding, one you helped to foster, that she can ultimately play the pussy card and you will comply. And while this may gratify her in the short-term, in achieving her desires for emotional security, she has already lost her respect for you in the long-term, as she simple doesn’t see you as a strong and confident man…the type of man she actually wants. Your first act of entering into a committed long-term relationship should not be an act of capitulation.
When women drive …relationships
When a woman states that ‘she wants to take things slow’, ‘she’s not that type of girl’, ‘she’s traditional’, it is either an active ploy of manipulation, to take control of the relationship or covert communication for “I have other options I’m weighing”, “you’re not my first and best option”, or “I’m not that into you”. Any way you slice it, you’re getting played, as the golden tenant of the SMP is that a woman will have no problem becoming sexual with you, if you exceed their attraction threshold. Sexual tension is the chemistry that binds the relationship. If sex isn’t on the table, neither should any form of commitment. Women naturally want a man who is going to take the lead and drive the direction of the relationship, that means also controlling the pace of the relationship. Only one of you should be behind the wheel of the relationship at any one time… and you both know who that should be…
Where the rubber hits the dating floor…
A man’s status, power and wealth are the historical hallmarks of a man’s value within the sexual market place, even more so than his appearance… , but it is his self-confidence, self-esteem, self-respect forming his sense of self-awareness of his true value that will set a man with none of the historical hallmarks apart in the sexual market place… it essentially is his calling card.
As fellow blogger Rollo Tomassi of the Rationale Male, succinctly put it:
“There is nothing as simultaneously fear inspiring and arousing for women as a Man that is self-aware of his own value.” “Feminization can’t afford men knowing their true value and potential and thus continuously seeks to confuse men and continually inspire doubt and humiliation.” “ In this regard, holding a belief that you are better than you really are will bring you more success with women than having a realistic appraisal of yourself. “ “It is vastly better to error on the side of too much boldness rather than too little…” “Touching a woman on the first date will get you further than not touching her at all…” “Five minutes of alpha behavior will flood the female brain with excitement, arousal and interest that hours of beta supplicating behavior ever will…”
The flip side of the same coin is to never market the relationship or your over-willingness to commit. Instead, focus on how being with you fulfills their emotional needs and desires in a way that would be betrayed by dependency needs, because when there’s a good relationship forming, the pressure you feel like you’ll lose the person doesn’t exist, due to the bond, trust and respect that you’ve both mutually created. When sex is exchanged for commitment, both parties loose, as what happens when there is a competing and better offer?
The all or nothing approach to dating more often than not leads to limiting results; either their partnership material or not and is too often the parting is unseemly and unfortunate. It is also immature and unsophisticated form of dating. In the process of spreading out you efforts across a wider pool of potential candidates, focus your intent into a form of social-networking and marketing, where that is precisely the goal, that you value developing new friendships over sexual transactions or end-goal objectives of obtaining a relationship. You should create and use these personal interactions that are so extraordinary and so powerful, that the women you see socially still desire your company and become an advocate for you, and you them, as reciprocity is important in any relationship.
Men will decide whether to date in search of a relationship and ultimately marriage, as opposed to dating recreationally, based upon their own personal assessment of the risks involved within the SMP, the perceived risks and attributes associated with a particular woman conveys and what they feel their sense of worth and entitlement demand for their own lives. The risks men face are extensive and run the gamut of financial, emotional, social, cultural, physical, legal and sexual. As a man, it behooves you to be fully informed about those risks, and the benefits you confer in your relationship and marriage potential. Women will need to demonstrate that they are low risk, high value, and of sterling character. That means among other things, a willingness to take their wedding vows dead seriously, and to speak out against divorce as a means of personal growths, self-expression and tapping into an unlimited supply of hypergamy ala ‘Eat, Pray, Love’…
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